So if you’ve been dissatisfied with most mainstream porn you’ve come across, ethical porn might be the answer. Here’s what makes ethical porn different and where to find it. There is a mutual understanding among everyone on the film set—everyone knows and feels comfortable with what’s happening. “Ethical porn validates the needs, boundaries, and curiosities of the performers," sex therapist Kamil Lewis, AMFT, tells mbg. It also often shows more realistic depictions of sex, including people with diverse body types, queer relationships, and real female pleasure. A 2018 survey by Pornhub said that 29% of visitors to the site in that year were female, up 2% from the year before. Ethical porn attempts to cater to that, offering scenes that aren’t solely centered around the male gaze. “Ethical porn is inclusive, creative, and consensual,” Lewis says. But how do you know if a platform is adhering to ethical standards, and what ethical standards are they adhering to? Warning: These are all obviously NSFW links. Erotic audio platforms also tend to cater to women and genders other than men, as they focus more on storytelling. “Much like ‘organic’ seems to have no clear meaning for food, I am not sure what ’ethical’ means for porn,” researcher and neuroscientist Nicole Prause, Ph.D., says. She says “ethical porn” platforms or film companies should clarify their stance on what exactly makes their films ethical and “help consumers by being more specific about how they think they are honoring ethical concerns.” Whether that be how they pay their performers or how they prioritize consent, plainly laid out explanations would ease many concerns consumers have about finding an ethical porn platform to support. As individual viewers, Lewis emphasizes the importance of doing your research. “That means potentially following your favorite performers on social media platforms, such as Twitter. Those platforms give performers a voice, so you might be able to see what their thoughts are on particular scenes or platforms,” she explains. “It also will give the opportunity to follow some of their work that is produced independently, or not on mainstream sites.” However you prefer to engage in porn, make sure you’re paying attention to the company you’re supporting. Opt for companies who are inclusive, treat their performers with respect, and encourage a sex-positive message. All it takes is a little digging and diligence. And Prause adds, “When you identify one that fits your values, support its production by consistently paying or rating the content well.” With a unique view on life, she taps into her own experiences to guide folks to live life for themselves, empowering them to explore their inner wild and find their own way in adulthood. Her weekly newsletter is a tiny way she furthers her mission to hold space for the unfathomable, romantic, and messy parts of life that make it that much more beautiful.
