Her words have even more resonance in today’s on-demand culture where porn (largely produced, directed, and watched by men) is sometimes the only sex education young men get. But in her book, O Wow: Discovering Your Ultimate Orgasm, Jenny Block suggests that it has more to do with female-to-female sex being less about reaching a proverbial finish line and more about creatively exploring pleasure. Does that mean straight women are just stuck with the short end of the stick forever (no pun intended)? Absolutely not. Block urges women to advocate for themselves in bed — seeking stimulation that suits the female body — mainly clitoral. So, next time you’re getting intimate, take the reins, and give your partner some adult sex education. Here’s how to prep for the best sex of your life. There are many erogenous zones on women’s bodies that produce pleasure including the clitoris, the G-spot, the vulva and the perineum. Explore all of them and find the unique combination of stimulation that works for you. Instead, focus on exploring what creates pleasure for both of you. Removing the split focus — and staying with one person for a good amount of time — allows you both to learn about each other. This slow build-up of sexual tension tends to be helpful for women to reach climax. Having that kind of triple play can lead to … mind-boggling, earth-shattering orgasm.” Anal stimulation does not necessarily have to be with a penis; fingers and slender dildos can work, or try simply stroking the anus. But keep in mind, the clitoris is the only organ in the body exclusively devoted to pleasure — don’t neglect it! Sexuality is complex. Find an open partner and a safe space — physically, emotionally, intellectually — in which to act out what turns you on. Orgasms don’t just feel great. They’re a crucial part of wellness. The hormones released during climax are known to relieve pain, depression, and stress. Oxytocin stimulates attachment, calmness, and a sense of well-being, while dopamine contributes to a natural high, a sense of elation, and a feeling of boldness. If the pleasure isn’t enough incentive for you, think about that. Orgasms improve our health and enrich our lives. Getting there is clearly worth a little effort. You can contact Gracie X here. In her new memoir, Wide Open, she explores her own emotional and sexual journey to earth-shattering orgasms.
